The last of Tokyo

Dawn broke on our last full day in Japan. The Daily Yomiuri arrived with news of HD-DVD's demise and we headed down, once again, to the Kiwk-e-mart for breakfast. Before setting out, we managed to check in for out flights – Japan seems completely topsy turvy with regards to internet access – in room wifi was free, but the communal PCs charged £1 for 10 minutes which is the exact opposite of Western hotels. Of course, with no wifi devices, we ended up racing through websites at break-neck speed trying to find the best seats and finish checking in before our credit ran out. We finally set out to the museum in Ueno – apparently the only museum in Tokyo worth visiting according to the Lonely Planet. We walked through a large cherry tree-filled arena to the museum. Amazingly, with money running low, we were gifted a pair of entrance tickets to not only the museum, but also the special exhibit from a couple who hadn't had time to go into the exhibit. After getting confused and buying some superfluous entry tickets, being told we'd bought superfluous tickets and getting a refund for said superfluous tickets we finally got into the museum. We wandered through halls of Japanese artefacts and tales of the past we ventured into the special exhibit. It's a very good job we didn't pay for it as the entire thing was a display of Japanese literature and other manuscripts – entirely in kanji with no English descriptors.



Eventually we had seen it all and headed back via Mos Burger to get packing. We had agreed to meet James in Shibuya for a big night, so being packed for the early departure was essential. We met up outside the station and wandered into Shibuya. Once again we found a restaurant on an upper floor with no obvious (ie English) sign it was there. This time we picked out a Korean all you can eat BBQ. Once again we went for the all-you-can-consume option - £15 for food and only £5 for all your can drink for 2 hours! Needless to say we totally cleaned up. These restaurants have no equivalent in the UK and it's not hard to see why. Within half an hour, we had completely incinerated most of the food to the point where our chopsticks caught fire. The entire atmosphere was smoky with the charring of other people meals. On the floors above and below the situation was no doubt being repeated and in Nanny State UK it's several steps beyond feasible. After the 2 hours had expired we were absolutely stuffed. We had definitely come out winners in the value for money game. James lead us to a nearby gaijin bar that was full of foreigners. Set out like an American bar, Japanese girls wandered around taking orders and when I said full it was very full. It was the most offensive place I've seen in ages: typically loud Americans dressed like gangstas. James reminisced about frequenting places like this before finding them equally offensive. After debating getting the last train home (especially for James who had some stupidly small amount of money to live on for 2 weeks) we decided to find an izhkaya. We settled down to a quiet beer and snacks. Or so we thought... The couple at the next table – or more specifically, the guy – cottoned on to us as English speakers and decided to practice his English on us much to the embarrassment of his girlfriend. His English was extremely broken and he ended up talking to James in Japanese before trying with us again. For some reason, in his inebriated state he decided I was the spitting image of a Japanese cheesy celebrity. After getting me to repeat his catchphrase for the next hour or so we decided to bail. As we left, James reassured me that I did in fact look nothing like the celebrity... For all it's advances over the West, Tokyo still suffers from a train network that shuts down at midnight. Spending the night in a karaoke booth was looking like the best option when we decided a taxi would be the best option as we definitely had a sofa that James could crash on for the night. We found a taxi but it appeared to be sans driver. It would have been better if he hadn't appeared, as when he did he was clearly half cut. He stumbled into the car to find the button to open the door. Eventually we were driving through Tokyo back to Ikebukuro. After a final visit to the Kwik-e-mart, we retired to the hotel. We then realised that the sofa we definitely had was in fact in the Sapporo hotel an the Tokyo Metropolitan only had an armchair. No doubt this is what comes from about 5 hours constant drinking. After passing out we woke up early and finished packing before heading out to Nippori to catch the Skyliner to the airport. Getting off at Nippori we heard the platform melodies for the last time. The current Skyliner trains were designed in the 80s and it shows – very boxy and lots of plastic. An hour later we pulled back into the underground station at Narita airport. We'd had to wait longer than we'd anticipated at Nippori and time before our flights was getting short. Unfortunately, the station is in the sub-basement and departures is on the upper levels which meant a lot of slow escalator rides as time ticked away. Further joy awaited me as we reached the check in floor – my flight had actually been allocated an earlier departure time – just 35 minutes away. James ran off to the BA desk as I traversed the concourse eventually finding the Air France desk at the far end. The staff looked confused when I started to put my stuff through the x-ray machine. They looked even more confused when I explained I was on the flight leaving in half an hour. Thankfully as I'd already checked in online there weren't any problems (maybe they were just confused in general) and soon we had been relieved of our suitcases and were heading downstairs to join the back of a massive queue (a BA 747, AF 777 and KLM 777 were all due to leave within 15 minutes of each other) to get through passport control. Time ticked on and just as we were next to be seen, they announced that our flights were being fast tracked. Even so I made time to go to the toilet. I said goodbye to James and boarded the 777-200. After all the rush we ended up being late pushing back anyway. After push back the captain applied forward thrust to the engines and from my window I saw a load of smoke shoot out of the back. Even James saw it from his plane. Not the most inspiring start to a journey. The AF inflight entertainment system is behind that of KLM's AVOD system so I only had a handful of films to keep me entertained. Pretty soon were over France and slowing down (these planes slow down pretty quickly which always makes me feel it's about to stall) on approach to Paris. Even though the return flight is against the winds I had once again managed to avoid the need to use the toilet. Score! Charles De Gaulle is a pretty bland airport and the less said about the plane back to Newcastle the better. I was soon back in Durham – thankfully I'd again hardcore'd the trip and beat the jet lag! Yes!